Success means different things to different people and I don't want to toot my own horn, but I think I'm pretty successful. I've always been ambitious, hard working and filled with self belief - the things I believe are absolutely essential to achieve whatever you want to achieve. I've been full-time blogging since 2015 and two years later I think its fair to say I have a prosperous career that I'm hoping continues.
With a book under my belt and bigger and better campaigns coming in every year, I wanted to discuss a few things I've learnt from success.
Smashing goals and ticking things off your to do list isn't always fun and games. With success comes great sacrifice and although the good is incredible, the bad can be equally as awful.
So lets dissect this.
Sometimes failure is a blessing in disguise
A few months ago I noticed a huge brand who I had previously worked with on a brilliant campaign, use pretty much everyone BUT me in a new campaign. I took it personally because it looked like it was a personal decision rather than business and I didn't think that was fair. I spent a day moping around whilst questioning my worth only to then check my emails in the evening to see I had just got a deal doing something bigger, better and much more up my street. It was in that moment I realised that sometimes missed opportunities and moments where you feel like you're failing can all be for a purpose. There have been other times in my life too where a door has closed right in my face, but a few weeks or months later another door opens. What is meant for you, will always be meant for you. Nobody can take that away.
It's okay to ask for help
I am THAT person who would rather struggle all on my own, than have to owe someone or give them credit for helping me. Its a personality trait I am heavily working on and 'being independent' is something that is so embedded inside of me, it can sometimes get the better of me too. But as I've gotten busier with my career whilst working on my personal life, I understand how important it is to ask for help. It doesn't make you weak or needy, it makes you mature and human. There are people out there who are willing to help you or support you when you need it. Whether its asking another blogger to assist you when working out rates for a sponsored post or asking your Mum to do your washing because you're so busy and you've got no clean clothes lol. Lean on these people from time to time.
Integrity is so important
Remaining passionate and driven will allow you to continue on your journey - even when the going gets tough. I feel like I'm the exact same person I was 4 years ago, in terms of humbleness and morals. If anything, I think my morals are even more firmer now. Yes - I'd like to take £3k for a post on detox tea but 1. I don't like tea THAT much 2. The word detox shouldn't even be a thing 3. Diet culture needs to die and 4. Why the fuck would I promote something that basically says 'you need to lose weight'? When you start to become successful its easy to forget where you came from and that can lead to a real shitty attitude and a sense of entitlement. I pride myself on honesty and I think everyone should do the same. Manners and politeness cost nothing but can end up costing you everything.
Lack of sleep is silly
There is a weird misconception that I genuinely used to buy into, that the less you sleep the more of a boss you are. However I learned very very very quickly that that is NOT the case. Lack of sleep actually makes you far more unproductive because you're tired, stressed, aggravated and moody. Its the same with food - never work on an empty stomach lol. Not sleeping enough is stupid and shows a serious lack of self care. You cannot pour from an empty cup and its so important to look after yourself. When I'm eating right, sleeping right and living right, I produce better content and can generally just get more things done.
Consistency is key
With running my own business that pretty much lives and dies online lol, I have realised that consistency plays a huge part in growth. When I'm consistent I get more work, more followers and more engagement and I think this applies to other jobs too. I think regularity shows professionalism and drive and who the hell doesn't like those qualities? If you are continuously good at what you do they can't ignore you.
It can be lonely as fuck
With every passing year I realise just how lonely success can be. You're too busy to maintain every friendship and when you grow as a person you sometimes outgrow people too. That's okay but when you want a chinese takeaway and your 4 friends are busy wtf do you do lol? In blogging, you have a lot of acquaintances but not many friends and when you walk into an event and realise that you don't have much in common with the people there, the isolation can knock you for six. Ever notice your successful friends only have a tight circle? There is a reason for that.
You need real friendships
That leads me on to friendships. To remain level headed & grounded you need a few close friends who will have your back no matter what. Trust is a huge thing for me and in the past 6 months alone I've realised how important trust worthy people are. Most industries are cut throat and having solid friends who you can just be yourself with is imperative. Rihanna has one best friend who goes with her everywhere. Again, there is a reason for that lol. You also need real ones to tell you when to slow down, when to stop being a bitch and to tell you how proud they are of you.
Saying no is just as important as saying yes
Ever said yes to every task and every opportunity and then burnt yourself out and broke down in tears due to stress because same! I even did this a few weeks ago. I sometimes have thoughts of 'omg what if I don't get any work in' so I take more work on than I essentially need to. I obviously don't say yes to detox tea spons LOL, but I have taken on one too many sponsored Instagram posts because I just can't fucking say no. I am learning slowly but surely not to do this because burning out and constantly feeling tired is no fun. Saying no doesn't mean you're ungrateful or lazy. It means you value your work enough to put 100% effort into the jobs you need to do, instead of taking on work that you don't need to do. Quality over quantity right? Same goes with turning nights out down because all you really want to do is have a long bath, read a good book and sleep for 15 hours.
You've got to enjoy every moment
I had a realisation during my book launch night that I rarely allow myself to enjoy all the wonderful things I do. I complete a job and then move onto the next. No Filter has been out a week and I am already working on two more book ideas, as well as doing press and all the wonderful bits and bobs that come with being a published author. But I really would like to remember all the moments that I encounter during my life because it could all disappear in the blink of an eye. Working hard is essential, but playing hard is good for the soul. Celebrate yourself and congratulate yourself on everything you accomplish - even the small things.